Galvanized Nails, Concrete, and a War Criminal on the Lam

It all started with the kitchen window. That is to say, what once was a kitchen window and had become the back of an awful wall. We tore away drywall only to discover crimes against humanity and all that is sacred. In a nutshell, the former owner of our casa had achieved his wall by:
1) sledge-hammering the brick window sill
2) attaching arbitrarily sized 2x4s directly to the cinder-block using a powder-actuated "snoop" (see the Wire, Season 4) nail gun and hardened steel galvanized masonry nails.

we've got some ideas on the bricks, but we'll have to save it for later. let's talk about the nails. From time to time, one can pry out a nail. More often than not, prying out nails results in giant explosive "blisters," as can be seen in the photo above.

So occasionally, a nail comes willingly.









more often, however, they require more coercive, "alternative extraction" techniques.

After some trial and error, we have developed three basic techniques to efficiently remove these abominations from our wall. If you should find unsightly 2x4 lumber "snoop" nailed to your wall, perhaps our methods will work for you.

First, know your enemy. As pictured, the lumber is attached to the wall by a galvanized, hardened steel masonry nail driven into the wall by something akin to a blank .22 powder actuated charge. There may be a bit of space between the board and the wall; the nail may have sunk deeply into the lumber. if you are lucky, the nail may not be particularly well bonded to the wall, and it will pry our (relatively) willingly. do not become accustomed to this; it is a gift and will be the exception, not the rule. a crowbar or hammer with a flat chisel type prying surface is a good start. pry, as best you can, in the direction the nail was driven into the wall. of course, be careful of softer masonry and note that if the nail does not wrest free easily, it will probably take a good chunk of your wall with it, so move on to a power-tool alternative.

all home owners need a sawz-all, or some other brand of reciprocating saw. they are wonderful instruments, efficient at destruction. if there is a bit of space behind the lumber, or if you can create a bit of space by prying the board and crushing the wood against the giant washer, slip a 12 inch bi-metal 14tpi metal-cutting sawz-all blade behind the lumber and go nuts. the blade will happily bend a lot. alternatively, use a wood type blade, cut away a notch behind the washer, switch to a metal cutting blade, and summarily decapitate the nail (this method is pictured above, right).

sometimes, an angle-grinder is a far superior tool for decapitating nails. compared to sawz-all solutions, angle grinders and metal cutting blades are inexpensive ($30 and $3 each respectively). it helps to pre-cut a notch in the wood, but it is not fully necessary. using a narrow metal cutting type blade, just go nuts and cut straight through the washer, wood, nail, whatever. these blades are not terribly efficient at cutting through wood, but they're inexpensive and effective enough. expect lots of sparks.

in both the sawz-all and especially the angle grinder methods, expect a lot of heat. keep handy a dripping-wet rag. when you start to smell wood smoke, douse the nail until it stops hissing. this should be sufficient to avoid spontaneous combustion.

there are a few variations on the power tool methods. for example, sometimes, it works well to cut partially through a nail and then use a crow-bar to pop off the top of the nail. it is exciting when the head of the nail and/or the washer shoots across the room with some velocity, but you might cover windows. did i mention that the nail-head-projectile will be super hot? i had some luck bending the nails while they were hot and then cooling them - presumably weakening them a little bit before popping off the top or smacking the board to snap them off at the base. in the end, it's a free-for-all - you against the nails.

after the nails have been decapitated, the lumber comes off the wall without much problem. of course, then you are left with a bunch of 1.5" steel death-pins sticking out of your wall. the sawz-all will take off this nail - bend the blade flat against the wall. the angle grinder is much more efficient, and there are lots of sparks.

one porch liberated, one to save.

power tools needed...

the past two weeks of the KQED and affiliated NPR radio stations, have inspired us. we need power-tools, and you can help.

Sears.com has helped us put together a short list of things we need:
http://www.sears.com/shc/s/GiftRegistryItemView?langId=&storeId=10153&catalogId=12605&externalId=900007405563010101&sortByItem=category&fwdURL=GiftRegistryItemfwdView&grUserType=BUYER

(the list id is: 900007405563010101)

of course substitutions are welcome. as a general rule, if it's a tool, we probably need it or could use an extra. sawz-all blades... can't get enough of them. we seem to have an abundance of wood, pipe, nails, wood with nails, nails with wood, pipe with nails, you name that needs cutting.

we would like to extend a special thanks to Tim Krasnansky. tim, above and beyond an excellent (former) neighbor and fantastic vet (http://www.berryessavet.com), his generous saws-all-loan (pictured above) has helped us to liberate our porch. fewer than half the galvanized nails driven into our wall by a powder actuated charge were a match for his saw (they were summarily delt with by angle-grinder).

Mr. Yoder, Tear Down This Wall!

and he did...

A Stoop for The Coon Hound

May 22, 2009

If Alger gets a castle, then I suppose it's only appropriate that Zuri get a stoop. Preferably

 she will get a really nice screened porch. As you can see, she is waiting patiently

 with her paws crossed. 

Here are some photo’s of what used to be the outside of the porch before the previous owner destroyed it.  

All of this will be ripped out and rebuilt as a screened porch/sun room. We are currently waiting on the custom french doors and windows to be installed before we rip the exterior bits shown bellow out. One more week to go...

Zoo of Death: the early days (retro-posted)

(originally drafted 27 april 2009, 3 days after closing, 3 days before moving in)

so it's done. i guess. i mean, after all the drama, there was no ribbon cutting ceremony. nobody even brought us keys - save the ones we stole from the realtor's lock-box. correction: OUR lock-box (we also own a very nice white post and "for sale" sign that will make a nice clothes line anchor).

as with any newly acquired house, there are problems. i knew i was a home owner after the 3rd time i fixed the toilet; i had it all sussed out after the 4th repair mission. we had lots of fun demolitioning the dry-wall off the stupid bedroom modification of what was once most certainly a wonderful porch. we're pretty upset about the galvanized concrete "snoop" nails driven into the exterior wall (see The Wire, S4), but like most problems, i think there is a saws-all solution. we found a great floors-guy, so the hardwood floors are sanded and finished. they will be beautiful. rebecca has done wonders with paint-brush and rollers.

but that's all normal stuff. ours house, i would guess, rates above average on the interesting scale. for example, after we clear out the "zoo of death" coridor in the garage (half of the dozen or so black widow and brown recluse spiders we've killed have come from the ZoD), we'll need to figure out how to bring electricity back to the garage. i've got half the outlets grounded now, but i feel the electricity in the bathroom should probably be:
1) grounded
2) gfi protected
3) securely attached to something

so we'll get the bathroom and kitchen as soon as we get half a break.

the good news is that this weekend, we'll be able to move our belongings out of the garage and into the house where they belong. we will have operational guest facilities by next weekend almost certainly. all are welcome to visit and contribute; we will be seeking counsel on wood, demolition, reconstruction, electrical, and landscaping related topics.

Office before- you can't see it, but there was TISSUE PAPER on the plaster walls. Why would anyone do this to beautiful plaster walls? WHY?! This is also a great 'before' shot of the floors. All of the dark discoloration and wax was stripped and sanded. The oak was then returned to a 'natural' finish. 

Office/library- after(ish).  Several attempts to scrape, steam and/or dissolve the tissue paper were made (many, many hours of attempts) before I gave up on the idea of complete removal of the tissue paper. Eventually I just applied Kilz (a HEAVY primer) sanded and then applied some fresh grey paint. We were so amazed at how well the floors turned out. Troy Bolen did a great job, we are still singing his praises (hardwoodlyr@hotmail.com) . 

living room after...

living room before...

before & after(ish)

a little 'before and after' 

May 20, 2009

Despite the last owner's molestations, the house is well built. Someone (back in 1950) put some time and effort into the design. 

Our First Home

A work in progress…



May 20, 2009





We've officially lived in the house for three weeks as of tomorrow. Looking back through our pictures it's hard to believe we've accomplished so much in just three weeks. That said, it's scary to think about how much more work we have to go. It seems a new complication emerges or a new project is added to the list daily. But that's the way of a remodel though, isn't it? It's all very exciting and we hope that our friends and family will share in the excitement (and maybe some of the labor too:)

Our accomplishments so far:

• Refinishing 800 sq. ft of original golden oak hardwood floors (thank you Troy!).


• Repainting most of the interior of the house, including: the entryway, living room, dining room, bedroom and office.


• Liberating 2/3 of the porch from the poorly (and illegally) applied drywall and insulation.


• Removing 100+ 'snoop' nails from porch masonry (think The Wire, season 4).


• Ordering custom doors and windows to replace what the previous owner smashed out.


• Taming the Zoo of Death. That is to say, the back of the garage is now mostly harmless...we've only killed one black widow in the last week. As opposed to the 30 we killed in the first week we lived in the house. Thank you Mr. Pest Control Man.


• Spending ~ $3,000 at Home Depot- at ~$1,000/week I'd say we're doing our part to help the economy!